The other night I told a friend of mine that I'd been thinking of a writing a list of questions which I could hand out to anyone who thinks they want to have a relationship with me. I mean men, who if they answer enough questions right could be friends with me or if they answered ALL the questions right, could actually have a Relationship with me, or at least start one. The reason for this is that suddenly I've attracted three potential Relationships with men I've met in recent months. I see how easy it is for having flowing conversations, a few laughs, or a good time, can make people skip over all the important issues, and become too involved, and then break up anyway.
WHO NEEDS THAT?
I decided the list of questions would be, not tricky, but the reader would not necessarily know where I was coming from so they couldn't guess what answers I hoped for. I would warn them to be honest since they had no idea.
The inspiration for this idea was a recent article that explained why everything you like or love about a person WILL BE ON YOUR NERVES in two years. Well, what happens is that the characteristic you liked or loved seems exaggerated at that point. He was neat. Now he's excessively neat and on your back about dishes in the sink. You loved her long hair. Now you go crazy waiting the two hours it takes for her to shampoo, condition, set, and comb out before you go out. Etc.
So I'm not going to tell you all the questions on my list. I'm going to tell you ONE and encourage you to make your own list, if you think that you'll have the courage to actually present it upon someone new in your life.
1) WHAT DO YOU THINK OF LAS VEGAS?
Showing posts with label Matchmaking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Matchmaking. Show all posts
4/1/14
DO YOU HATE DATING? YOU CAN'T BE MATCH MADE
Is this you?
You can't be match made.
When someone tries to match you, you feel uneasy, even angry.
You don't want to go out to clubs, unless you just want to dance or listen to the music, but you would happily hang at a table and talk, or dance and say "Thanks! but no Thanks" because you do not want to give out your phone number or ask for anyone else's number. You do not want to pretend that you will call someone to see them again, unless maybe just as friends.
But you've noticed that when you say "I'm just looking for friends" most of the time you are not believed. If someone is interested in you more than you are interested in them, saying that you're just interested in meeting people for friendship usually results in them trying to change your mind - now you're a challenge!
So if you're simply nice, because you aren't trying to be mean, just honest, the whole club scene just results in follow up and follow through you aren't really interested in.
You're not anti-social. You just don't want to date. Not now. Maybe not ever. You need to get over you past experiences or you need a break. Maybe the problem is sex. You don't like it or you want to wait until marriage or you think it's over emphasized.
Maybe you want to try going a year or longerwithout having sex at all, because you find that sex seems to complicate things.
You are not interested in meeting on the Internet either. The whole experience leaves you feeling like you're in a beauty competition and marketing a product when you're a person. It feels unnatural to you - and a time waster.
Or you've tried it and it didn't work for you. You spent your time meeting people who just wanted to e-mail, or who you met in person and didn't want to actually date you after all that.
IS THIS YOU?
Sister
(All original writing on this blog is C Sister/ Never Married No Kids Blogspot)
You can't be match made.
When someone tries to match you, you feel uneasy, even angry.
You don't want to go out to clubs, unless you just want to dance or listen to the music, but you would happily hang at a table and talk, or dance and say "Thanks! but no Thanks" because you do not want to give out your phone number or ask for anyone else's number. You do not want to pretend that you will call someone to see them again, unless maybe just as friends.
But you've noticed that when you say "I'm just looking for friends" most of the time you are not believed. If someone is interested in you more than you are interested in them, saying that you're just interested in meeting people for friendship usually results in them trying to change your mind - now you're a challenge!
So if you're simply nice, because you aren't trying to be mean, just honest, the whole club scene just results in follow up and follow through you aren't really interested in.
You're not anti-social. You just don't want to date. Not now. Maybe not ever. You need to get over you past experiences or you need a break. Maybe the problem is sex. You don't like it or you want to wait until marriage or you think it's over emphasized.
Maybe you want to try going a year or longerwithout having sex at all, because you find that sex seems to complicate things.
You are not interested in meeting on the Internet either. The whole experience leaves you feeling like you're in a beauty competition and marketing a product when you're a person. It feels unnatural to you - and a time waster.
Or you've tried it and it didn't work for you. You spent your time meeting people who just wanted to e-mail, or who you met in person and didn't want to actually date you after all that.
IS THIS YOU?
Sister
(All original writing on this blog is C Sister/ Never Married No Kids Blogspot)
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