UNHAPPILY INFERTILE and an NMNK?

Early in my blogging here at NEVER MARRIED NO KIDS BLOGSPOT, I said that being NMNK is sometimes NOT A CHOICE, but just how a person's FATE is.  

I know some people who are NMNK really did not and do not WANT to be.  I can only assure them that a person can so have a good life without marriage or children.

I understand that sometimes people experience a seachange and want what they did not before.  This can include marriage or having children.  Because so many people are having multiple committed relationships today, including marriage-like living-together without the papers experiences, who is NMNK gets more difficult to define.  My own person feeling, which came upon me young, that I did not WANT to have children, that I did not WANT to be married in a conventional way - be a stay at home mom - does dominate this blog. For a long time I was open to the idea that I might experience a relationship and a new desire for children but it hasn't happened and I no longer give it that chance that it will.

My experience with infertility is NOT PERSONAL but vicarious, based on knowing people who have had that seachange, wanting children after years of marriage, or as a person gets into her thirties without any husband.  These women have sometimes waited until they are at an age when fertility is naturally in decline.  Then it seems they get desperate fast.

I still think it's ridiculous to become a single mother on purpose and without significant familial or friendly commitment to help raise a child or children and without a high income or huge savings.  I feel it's a prerequisite to afford a child or children alone.  I'm being realistic. You'll have to pay for childcare for years as you work.  You'll have to afford so much alone.  

Even friends who were married and then divorced with children and high incomes I feel suffer in the single mom lifestyle.  They are always running, always stressed, always to some degree anxious and insecure. They are eager to put my choices down by saying that I could not possibly understand since I don't have children, or even it's because I have never given birth.  I think I can see what's happening clearly.

Their children for the most part have taken full advantage of their parent's guilt over not giving them a two parent family and the parents and other caregivers compensate with spoiling materially and giving into them.  These children rule the house and I can only hope that there's a natural maturing process in place. I dread a younger generation of demanding brats: Narcissist Personality Disorders on the rise.

If you are a person who has wanted children and cannot have any due to infertility and expensive medical options are not yours, there are still many ways to be NURTURING.  I suggest volunteering working with children or being involved in a mentoring program such as Big Sisters Big Brothers programs.

Here is a link: Big Sisters Big Brothers

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KEY TO VERY LONG LIFE? DON'T GET MARRIED! LOUISE JEAN SIGNORE TURNS 107!

Here's a NMNK I just heard about!  She looks to be a sweety!

DAILY MAIL, LOUISE JEAN SIGNORE SUGGESTS ITALIAN FOOD and NEVER GETTING MARRIED

At 103 she was mugged and her bingo cards were taken from her.  Born in 1912, she's lived through many Presidential administrations.

STOP TELLING ME I'LL CHANGE MY MIND : CHRISTEN REIGHTER